Humorous and ironic articles about .tel domains

Domain thief arrested after pushing .tel domains

Posted by Lucius "Gunz" Fabrice on September 27, 2009

Belfast, Ireland – TPS News

Police have arrested notorious domain thief Patrick Daniel O’Hullahan, also known as “The TLDster” in a raid of a local pub in east Belfast. The domain thief is being held on a number of charges, including possession of stolen domain names, extortion and public exhibition.

"We were on this lad for a good six months now, and he made the mistake of challenging the constables at Belfast central“, said Mickey O’Rourke, chief police inspector, adding: “There’s no way to push a .tel domain after you steal it from its righteous owner. The ingenious level of data inside a WHOIS record of .tel domains make them virtually impossible to steal”.

TelNIC registry media representative, Robert Bob, was gleaming about the success of his company’s security layer.

“This is proof that .tel continues to grow by leaps and bounds, and it’s the future of the domain industry as well as that of the educated technology world. In the near future, you won’t be able to carry, wear or eat anything that’s not tied to your person via a unique DNA id. We are working on some patents right now.”

An evidently drunk Patrick Daniel O’Hullahan was seen being forced into a police car for further interrogation. Facing the media for a brief moment, he exclaimed: “Oh, piss off telnic and bloody hell to all your shite!”

Source: Domaingang.com

Posted by Lucius "Gunz" Fabrice on March 23, 2010

In an effort to retain thousands of .tel domains that expired or will expire during the remainder of the week, TelNic – the Registry known for the biggest and most inventive TLD ever to leave the ICANN uterus – considers offering free renewals.

We met the TelNic boys at their local pub, where they usually gather for brainstorming.

“It was a non-brainer, really, after our successful launch of Ben.tel”, said Bryan McTelbot, chief propaganda officer for TelNic. “How would we retain the momentum of registrations since a year ago when .tel became available? By giving it away for free, of course!”, he added while on his 4th pint of Guinness.

Often seen as a revolutionary addition to the group of other healthy or not so healthy TLDs, .tel bears the unique characteristic of a DNS layer that cannot be modified in order for the .tel domains to be parked or developed.

One can only store information meant to be displayed on smartphones, in order to effectively give sassy blonde chicks your phone number and get them in bed.

“Oh fock it mate, this is whot it takes, this is whot it will be!”, said Timmy – last name unknown – promotional manager for TelNic. “We’re focking tired with this ball-busting rage against .tel you know mate? So bollocks to it all, .tel is here to stay!”, he added, stumbling on his way to the bathroom.

Source: Domaingang.com